Yesterday I gave up hope…for five minutes. I put my head in my hands, I swallowed back the tears and I thought about just not trying anymore. I thought about just giving up, not trying anymore, and that feeling was nice…for five minutes. It felt like, despite all the positive energy I have been trying to put out into the world, someone, somewhere is trying really hard to knock me down. The problem is they are succeeding….for five minutes. So what’s happened:
1. I was turned down for my first property application of 2013
2. I lost a receipt which is worth $100
3. My brand new Pandora watch which my parents had bought me for my 30th birthday just stopped working
4. I found out that in order to be fast-tracked for permanent residency in Australia I have to be the most senior position in my field in my company. Being second in command gets you nothing, meaning I have to wait two years before I can get any security in Australia.
5. I booked a weekend away and then found out that I am have to work that weekend which means I just threw away $500
6. I was turned down for my second property application of 2013 (which was beautiful and which someone else will now get to call home)
Seriously? All in one week? I know it can get worse but I am not sure I can take much more. And then I took five minutes, and I counted up the good things that have happened:
1. I have kept to my new year’s resolution (so far) and have blogged everyday
2. I have a beautiful puppy whose health is getting better everyday
3. I have a home, a job, money in the bank and family and friends all over the world
4. I have begun building bridges with my evil ex (who may not be so evil after all)
5. Everywhere I look there are people who love and care about me
6. There is a boy…(more about that another time)
Writing and reading the good things has made me well up more than the bad things did and it makes me realise that I do have to keep trying.
Today’s #fmsphotoaday is ‘something beginning with “t”. Now I struggled with this for a while. Trees, tip-ex (or ‘white out’ as Australians call it), toilet(!), tissue, t, t, t,….what on earth began with ‘t’ that I could relate this blog to? Then, as I was sat on the bus on my way to work, it struck me, ‘traffic light’. I hope the metaphorical traffic lights in your life, are always green, just like this literal one!
This is my year, I will not give up. I will keep trying until every traffic light is always green (and so should you).